The power of nature to get our attention or change our mood is amazing when we pay attention. What is it about watching how the sky can change, or seeing a setting sun like this that stops one in his/her tracks? It can take one’s breath away and calm us down if we are lucky. Nature and the sky can seem miraculous  in her beauty and changing patterns . Many of us don’t live in places where we can see the sun rise or set, for any number of reasons. Or we don’t take a pause?

Here we share this beautiful sunset we enjoyed a few nights ago.

Curiosity means wanting to know or learn more. Generally there is an excitement or keen interest as part of one’s curiosity. Curiousity is being intrigued to know more and that interest keeps one engaged in life.

We might think of those who age, that their interests in others and new things wanes. For some it does yet those who stand out and are seen as interesting themselves, it is because they are curious and interested in what is happening around them. Maybe if we weren’t curious in our youth, we won’t become so in our later years yet to remain engaged in life it helps to be curious about people and events.

There is a difference between being curious and being nosey. Curiosity is usually with the desire to learn or know something that helps to better understand that person or that circumstance. Curiosity helps expand one’s knowledge base. Maybe it is splitting hairs, yet nosey is usually to gain information for one’s own sake and pass it along in a way of gossip or to feel superior in some way. Nosey is a negative, low vibration whereas curiosity is a positive, higher vibration. To the outsider maybe curiosity and nosiness can look the same. The difference would be in the intention and later, how the information is used.

Being curious is also a way of expressing interest in a person or thing. To feel curiosity throughout one’s life is a form of openness and a desire to understand. That’s keeps us young at heart, and that’s gotta be part of aging deliciously!

We seem to be in turbulent times. In such times, we are challenged to learn how to calm ourselves, our innards. To know how to calm oneself can be an important gift to give ourselves and those around us. Emotions can be wild things. We might think they just are our emotions. What can we do? They are real and they are happening. And yes, when a horrible thing happens we will have thoughts and feelings about it. How do we help ourselves calm down? Some people feel they live with adrenaline pumping through them most of the day, based on rushing through their daily life, a feeling of urgency with most things, and the awful news coming from the bigger world of news. The constant adrenaline shooting through the body stresses and fatigues it, and seems to lead to anxious feelings.  We all seem to experience levels of anxiety these days. It ain’t fun that’s for sure and too much of it becomes a health risk, especially to our adrenal glands.

So how can we calm ourselves down? What soothes you when you are upset or agitated? Breathing 3 deep breathes right away as we feel ourselves start to get upset, or feel a large emotion about to take hold. Maybe Breathe in for 3 seconds and out for 3 seconds. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. It is quick, easy and available to us all. Breathe deeply before making that phone call you’ve been putting off. Breathe deeply in common daily moments as a reminder and soother for yourself; maybe as you stand at the check out counter, sitting on the bus, walking, driving, waiting. Take some deep breathing moments each day and notice how your body responds.

Maybe a walk in nature, amongst the flora or fauna in your area, soothes you and brings you a sense of calm? Or taking a quiet moment for yourself to sit, listen to music, draw, write or read some pages from a favorite book.

Self-soothing is an important power to have over oneself, as anything outside of ourselves might surprise, hurt, annoy or please us when we least expect it. To self-soothe, or bring our core to a clearer, calmer space means we can be in charge of how we feel and respond. We have that power. And it is an important power to cultivate.

When we find what soothes us, maybe we can share what we’ve learned with others. That way we all help one another share and add more “tools to our toolboxes” to feel better equipped in these wild times.

Peace matters. In our hearts. In our families. In our communities. In our organizations. In our leaders. In our world. 

Here is a quote by Marshall Rosenberg who developed the curriculum and trainings, Nonviolent Communication.

“Never make a request from a position of authority without revealing your heart.”

Marshall Rosenberg, 

Maybe we can build a world and lucrative industry of Peace Makers:)

Marshall B. Rosenberg
Marshall Rosenberg in 2005
Born	October 6, 1934 Canton, Ohio, U.S.
Died	February 7, 2015 (aged 80) Albuquerque, New Mexico, U.S.
Residence	Albuquerque, New Mexico, U.S.
Nationality	American
Alma mater	University of Michigan University of Wisconsin–Madison
Occupation	Peacemaker Author
Known for	Nonviolent Communication

Marshall Rosenberg (October 6, 1934 – February 7, 2015) was an American psychologist, mediator, author and teacher. Starting in the early 1960s he developed Nonviolent Communication, a process for supporting partnership and resolving conflict within people, in relationships, and in society. He worked worldwide as a peacemaker and in 1984^[1] founded the Center for Nonviolent Communication, an international non-profit organization ^[2] for which he served as Director of Educational Services.

“I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.”

Martin Luther King, Jr. 

The Golden Rule is the underpinning truth of what is taught in all religions, faiths and practices. These are basic truths that come from kind, wise hearts.

We can deny the truth of the Golden Rule yet denial does not change what is true.

Do as you will, as long as you harm no one.

When we have a reaction or response to something that seems crazy or messed up or seems to favor a group of people but maybe not us, asking Who said? is a good step in untangling what may not work for you, or maybe our world anymore.

Isn’t it wild to realize that every rule, law, decision of how things need to be, from fashion, to the stock market,  to recycling in our neighborhood, people decided that it made sense and now this is how things are accepted as the way? Who said? Who showed up at those meetings, or had the influence, or knew it would work for making more money or be good for the environment? What was motivating those who decided? Who Said?

It is good to question a lot of things we may take for granted into believing as solid truths. Beliefs we hold , we might make sacred about a rule, law or method.

We believe certain things as that is just how the world works. Who told us? Who makes up the world? People. Who decides? Those in position of power or influence at the time, or those who show up with other ideas. And in many cases we all have choice. Whether to follow the herd (mainstream)  or follow your inner voice of reason and rightness. Trust what is right for you right now, as that usually is where there is true wisdom for oneself and ultimately for our relationships, family and communities. (And we don’t mean justifying our bad behavior and saying that is our inner wisdom.)

Mainstream anything, is just that, the herd not making wise choices for everyone, but doing what is easiest or most convenient for them. Pay attention. When those in your orbit say something they believe to be just the way it is, but it feels crazy weird to you in this changing world, ask yourself , is that right? Who Said? Who does that favor? What is another way I can participate, act, be, contribute that fits my nature right now and does no harm? Do sexy women wear red stilettos shoes? Do strong men not cry,  share feelings, or do laundry? Who said? We each can decide, and in our own confidence or choice, be it micro or macro level, we say.

Who Said? Better conversations and solutions may come from us just asking Who Said? We all can listen, explore, untangle assumptions and amend the plan, practice or direction. Who will be most motivated to ask Who said , and listen? Those who aren’t currently being served by the way things are being done in our homes, work places, communities and beyond.

Who Said? Don’t take this author’s word for it. Keep asking and noticing and making the change that you want to see.