We need more conversations. And to clarify, a conversation is when we listen, are curious, consider the other points of view, and keep adding to the conversation in ways that may illuminate or expand on the topic, moving it forward. We aren’t arguing or attacking, no. We are listening and feel curious about what is being said, and what we might learn.
We may be getting out of practice of listening, allowing other points of view to intrigue us rather than threaten us. There is a school of thought that to be part of a true conversation, that in that space, many problems can actually be solved. Have you ever been in a great exchange session where you could keep building and building on what was just said or offered? Without fresh input we rarely come up with real creative solutions. When we are invited to participate, meaning we aren’t being shut down, then amazing new thought connections can be made. It is exhilarating.
How can complex long standing problems get solved, really solved, if we aren’t open and really listening? Or if we keep attacking the speaker? Or get attacked? We can be hard on ideas, but not on people. In a relaxed conversation, where it is understood we are going to listen, be curious and consider, that energy can lead us to see helpful solutions emerge. Or certainly an inspired discussion that provided good reflection.
We can assist in initiating more conversation in our day to day lives, be it in our homes, work or play. Conversation requires some open ended questions that might start with How, When, or What.We may feel shut down by a conversational opportunity with remarks like “That’s stupid”, or You are so….”, or Why would you say that? or …..well, you get the picture. What we say can put an end to any chance of a real conversation, or fully open it up.
True conversation seems a rarity, maybe an art we need to initiate where we can. To be part of a conversation that welcomes all voices and no one person is dominating, announcing or holding court. Imagine!! Give it a whirl.